


Of Starry Tears

by TheTwins



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Comfort, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, Romance, Sexuality Crisis, identity crisis, jeongcheol - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-10
Updated: 2017-06-10
Packaged: 2018-11-12 08:25:15
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,455
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11158029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheTwins/pseuds/TheTwins
Summary: When Jeonghan’s fallen head over heels for his straight-as-a-ruler best friend, what else can he do but go through yet another sexuality crisis and wish upon a shooting star?*Requested on AFF by Anime-Advenger and cross-posted there under Seventeen Oneshots





	Of Starry Tears

**Author's Note:**

> This was written listening to Lady Gaga’s “The Cure” which is why there are song lyric references. :) I hope you like it~
> 
> ~Pollux

It was the weirdest feeling—waiting, that was, Jeonghan mused as he let the phone drop with a painfully dull thud that barely registered in his mind as he blinked several times. It looked to be raining outside the window, but Jeonghan wasn’t too sure if that was because it was raining inside too, but he didn’t really care either way.

His whole body felt numb, especially his hands that lay limp by his side with fingers still mourning the memory of the buzzing phone.

What had he done?

 

Two hours ago, he had been fine. Jeonghan had just come home to his apartment from a party, the college kind with just a few too many drinks and loose laughter. When a pretty girl asked him out, he’d even said yes. After all, he was the so-called campus angel, muse of the art department, sought after by literally every person who was blessed by his presence—male or female. And she was the campus sweetheart, with round doe eyes that sparkled and a tinkling laugh that would linger in the hallways the same way perfume did.

But for some reason, he’d hesitated.

When she approached him, still leaning against the counter with a drink in one hand, his nose had wrinkled at the smell of alcohol on her breath. Any other man would’ve probably gotten drunk at the sweet fragrance, but he couldn’t stand it.

When she asked him, eyelashes batting as she looked up at him with a delicately framed face and soft smile, he had to down a drink first until those light hazel eyes blurred in front of him to say yes. And even then, he wasn’t too sure what he said exactly. He only remembered the way her smile widened, revealing a pair of dainty incisors that had him wonder offhandedly if he had just agreed to give away his soul.

 

Now, piecing together those moments, Jeonghan was certain he’d flinched at her touch, made up a sorry excuse to use the restroom, and left in a taxi.

But of course, that wasn’t all too true either.

For in between his escape endeavors, there was the reason he now sat on his kitchen floor questioning his very existence—with only the harsh yet soft light of the cell phone screen to keep him company.

It wasn’t necessarily a very complicated reason, Jeonghan laughed as he laid his head to rest on the hard refrigerator door. Even worse, it was too simple.

And it went by the name of S. Coups—Choi Seungcheol.

 

If his memory wasn’t failing him, he had turned a corner too quickly—so fast he hadn’t bothered to note that running under the influence was probably just as bad as driving under it, and for the same reasons—and ran right into his best friend, Seungcheol. Seungcheol who—in naturally tousled hair, shiny earrings, a too-tight tank top, and dark, ripped jeans—looked like some Greek god, a thought that sprung into Jeonghan’s head quite surprisingly. But the more important part of that memory was that Jeonghan quite literally fell head over heels and the next thing he knew, a pair of strong arms were wrapped around him and the scent of cologne wafted over him pleasantly.

Unfortunately, before Jeonghan had time to question why he’d never seen his best friend like this—since when was he so handsome?—or why he felt a sudden urge to bury his face in the crook of Seungcheol’s neck, he must have heard the girl’s voice calling out for him.

After all, that could be the only explanation for what he did next—

 

Jeonghan groaned and slapped a hand over his eyes.

What had he done?

Oh, only just the worst thing he could’ve ever imagined.

 

—He’d kissed him.

His best friend.

_A guy._

He had reached up to tangle one hand in messy hair and another to loop around the other man’s neck and pulled.

It was quite a vivid memory.

And after that, he’d run into a taxi dripping wet from the rain.

So he supposed he hadn’t been fine two hours ago.

 

Sitting there, Jeonghan supposed he probably hadn’t been fine since the beginning, all thanks to a certain Choi Seungcheol.

Choi Seungcheol—the name that was still flashing on his too-bright cell phone screen.

“You have a new text,” It sang out mechanically, mercilessly repeating every 10 seconds.

 

See, his second mistake of the night—or perhaps the third if he counted drinking too much as the first—was that he immediately called said reason for his confused tears right after he stepped foot in his door, said possibly the worst message known to man in the form of “I need to talk to you” except it came out sounding more like “I need you,” and proceeded to hang up in a wave of fresh regret and embarrassment.

And once he came to his senses, Jeonghan realized what was probably the fourth mistake of the night—Seungcheol was straight, straight as a ruler if not more so. He was probably even more confused than Jeonghan at the moment.

In a combination of a sigh and a sniffle, he wiped away a tear only to find a smudge of jet black mascara painting his hands. Even better. All that makeup seemed like another mistake. Whose attention had he even been seeking?

Clearly, not a girl’s.

Dread sinking in his stomach, he lifelessly felt around for his phone, lifting his eyes up to the window where moonlight was too blurred by rain to enter the room.

S. Coups couldn’t come.

He couldn’t know.

“You have two new texts,” The monotonous robot voice cackled.

 

From: Coups

To: Hannie

Where r u? U OK?

Sent 1:14 am.

Seen 1:43 am.

 

From: Coups

To: Hannie

I’m in front of your door, open up.

Sent 1:43 am.

Seen 1:43 am.

 

“Well, fuck.”

Considering how Seungcheol was in on a football scholarship, Jeonghan didn’t doubt one second that the older man would be fine kicking down the door if he left him on read. Truthfully, he was a oversized puppy with accidentally destructive tendencies. He smiled ruefully.

That left only one option where he still retained his front door, so Jeonghan dragged himself up and slowly turned the knob.

Surprisingly, he wasn’t assaulted or tackled into a bear hug as he had become accustomed to. Seungcheol stood there with an expression Jeonghan couldn’t read, wet strands of hair curling around his face under a dripping hoodie. Jeonghan stood there, not sure when he’d grabbed the towel but he clutched it tightly in his hands.

The two simply stood there and stared.

That is, until Jeonghan shivered and Seungcheol cleared his throat. “You said you needed me?” For some reason, his voice seemed lower and coarser than before.

“Oh yeah,” Jeongcheol shoved the towel at him. “Come in first, before you start making puddles.”

 

After what seemed like an hour of wringing his hands and desperately wiping at his mascara tears in futile attempts of removing the darned makeup without proper makeup remover—which was in his bathroom currently occupied by the certain very handsome, very straight best friend—Jeonghan resigned himself to sit down on the sofa and recite his confession.

“Oh yes, I called you over to say I needed to talk to you. Wanna help me out? I think I’m gay?” He laughed at the air. “Or bi, who knows. But yeah. Sorry about earlier, let’s pretend that didn’t happen.” His voice trembled. “Yeah, I’m fine. I don’t care what people think—” Even he thought he sounded silly with his voice breaking. Because while Jeonghan truly did not give two shits about what others thought, he cared what Seungcheol thought.

“I-I’ll be fine.”

_I’m in love with you._

Unspoken, those words appeared on his tongue so quickly, Jeonghan had to clamp a hand on his own mouth in case Seungcheol was done washing up.

Breathing in and out slowly, he pried his eyes away from the ground to check the room and then looked out the window. In the background, he could hear the clear sound of rain—not the cute, dainty pitter patter of lands far, far away but the relentless crying of the sky as if it knew his heart. Perhaps, he should make a bet on racing raindrops and see which fell off his chin first.

With the phone still lying on the kitchen floor and the moonlight fractured, each raindrop stealing itself a piece of loveliness in its loneliness, it seemed like he too could fall into the darkness of the night. But for a second, maybe less, a light shimmered through the window—winking like the moon’s lover. Perhaps it was a stray street lamp that he’d never noticed, or a trespassing teenager’s errant flashlight, but Jeonghan liked to think it was a shooting star. And so, he made a wish.

Aloud.

And two seconds later, soft humming drifted from the bathroom above the sound of rain.

“I will be right by your side~”

And while Jeonghan was positive that Seungcheol could not have heard his wish, maybe—just maybe—someone out there did.

“Coups?”

The humming was back. “Yeah?”

“Nothing.” Jeonghan smiled. From where he sat on the couch, for some reason it felt like they were sitting back to back with only the bathroom door in between them.

“You sure?”

“Well,” Jeonghan bit his lip. “Give me five minutes.”

His mind flickered back to all the all-nighters they had pulled before and late night talks on the phone. Then, he thought of Seungcheol’s sweet smile and kind eyes. All those times before, when Jeonghan hadn’t known he was falling in love.

Even if he couldn’t tell him everything, a little bit would be enough. Seungcheol would understand.

As he closed his eyes, Seungcheol’s soft voice drifted back like a lullaby.

“If I can’t find the cure, I’ll fix you with my love~”

 

Jeonghan wasn’t quite sure when five minutes had turned into five hours but when his alarm went off at 7 o’clock in the morning, he found himself in his own bed, warmly wrapped in blankets just before the point of well-intentioned accidental suffocation with sunlight peering through the window.

Startlingly clear-headed, he sat up with a frenzied motion, throwing off the covers.

“Coups!”

“Yes?” A warm voice responded from the direction of the living room.

And that was when his promise hit him. Five minutes. What a snake. Stumbling to change out of his party clothes, Jeonghan stopped in front of the bathroom mirror. Someone—Seungcheol, or was it the kiss of some sunlight faerie—had wiped off his dried mascara tears. Raising a hand to touch his cheek softly, he smiled.

 

“So, you’re gay.”

Jeonghan almost swore out loud. And by almost, he meant of course he swore. “For fuck’s sake, why can’t people come out of the shower without being ambushed by intruders?” But there was no bite in his words. Instead, he opted to raise a single eyebrow at his best friend who stared back at him from the sofa. “Who said that?”

“You did,” Seungcheol’s lips quirked up into a quiet laugh. “Yesterday.”

Groaning internally, Jeonghan realized that Seungcheol must have heard the practiced confession he’d been reciting. So, Jeonghan nodded, watching S. Coups’ face for a reaction. “Or—”

“—Bi,” Seungcheol smiled kindly. “Yes, but who knows, right? What’s wrong with that?”

Blinking away sudden tears, Jeonghan gestured randomly. “Nothing’s wrong with it! I-It’s just that I-I didn’t know until now? And I was confused.”

Gently shushing him, Seungcheol smoothed a thumb over his cheek, shifting so that there was enough room for the younger to sit facing the other on the sofa.

“Hannie, it’s okay.”

Allowing the larger man to envelope him in a hug, Jeonghan could make out the yellow sunlight lighting up the window through his tears and the glistening streaks like shooting stars left by the raindrops in the nighttime.

“Coups-ah, it can’t be okay.” Jeonghan sighed, closing his eyes as he breathed in the familiar scent of faint cologne. Half his mind was screaming to take what he could, give nothing back—just be grateful for such a good friend who wouldn’t judge by sexuality— but the other half was whispering to his heart—kiss him.

“It’s okay,” Seungcheol murmured into his hair, humming, “Close your eyes, I’ll sing your favorite song~”

Sighing again, Jeonghan rested his head in the crook of Seungcheol’s neck.

“Hush now, baby, don’t you cry. Anything you want could not be wrong~”

“But Coups,” Jeonghan protested, finally dragging himself away from the warmth to look the other in the face. “I’m serious. It can’t be okay.” He went on when S. Coups made no move to say anything to the contrary. “I’m in love with a straight guy.”

Seungcheol didn’t move.

Jeonghan decided that maybe he wasn’t clear enough. “Emphasis on straight.”

Seungcheol nodded slowly, as if to affirm that he had heard Jeonghan the first time and was just processing the news. Then came the dreaded question. Jeonghan could almost hear it in the air, and see it in those warm, brown eyes that met his.

“Who?”

“You.”

The answer came out so naturally, having danced on his sealed lips from the moment he woke up, that he barely registered it until it was too late. As Seungcheol’s eyes widened, Jeonghan got up and tripped in his attempt to run back to his room, arms windmilling with a rising sense of déjà vu.

And thus, he thought it would have been fair to consider his whole life a large mistake if not for the wonderfully warm but sadly short-lived feeling of those strong arms around him again. Maybe if he felt up to it, Jeonghan would like to list a few of those adjectives to describe exactly how devastating it was leave the other man’s embrace once he was again upright—starting with devastating and of course ending with heart-breaking.

However, it didn’t end.

The sunlight kept streaming through the window and dancing on their hair illuminating their faces as Seungcheol simply pulled him closer so that they could hear each other's’ heartbeats.

“I, uh,” the elder whispered, his voice low and husky and his breath sending shivers down Jeonghan’s spine as he pulled them both down to the sofa and pressed their foreheads together. “I’m not straight.” Jeonghan’s breath caught. “And I love you too—emphasis on love.”

Seungcheol cupped his face in his hands.

“And I don’t want to pretend yesterday never happened.”

And finally, it might have been the best thing to do so Jeonghan thanked the stars, and kissed him.


End file.
